Finding what you love through what you don’t

After a year of graduate school, I had thought I had a good idea for the direction of my final project, my thesis. I had been turning over this idea in my mind for over six months, thinking about the sources I could use, the topics I could cover, how exciting it would be to write about something I was interested in. I decided to try to get an early start and wrote about my supposed thesis topic as a final paper in one of my Spring classes. I read and wrote and took notes. And I was shocked at the result.

 

I hated my topic. I hated writing about it. I found it so challenging to even get a good sentence out. And a paragraph was an all-night affair. It took me more than two weeks to write the paper and it did not turn out at all like I wanted. And, truthfully, that called into question what it was that I wanted the paper and my thesis to be.

Writing this paper helped me to understand myself and the passions that I have. There are some subjects and genres that I work very well with, and others not as much. I have such a better grasp on what I want to do and what I liked to do because I tried something new. Even though I ended up hating my topic, I’m glad I found out about it now!

I’ve learned, through trial and error, to write what I love, and eventually to love what I write

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